Even though we're navigating unprecedented circumstances, you may have noticed old negative patterns faithfully sticking around -- procrastinating, social anxiety (this can happen over video calls too), self-doubt about what you're doing and where your life is headed, etc. Okay, so you've identified unhelpful patterns, and you're hankering to change them -- what do you do?
Negative behaviors that we want to shed or transform into something more in alignment with our personal values and life goals require close attention. Noticing your patterns usually does not in itself spur change. Because then you wouldn't be reading this, right? This is why traditional talk therapy often is not very effective, or at least not as quickly as my clients prefer. Changing negative patterns requires becoming aware of the anxiety in your body that triggered them, and, if you really want to dig into the root of the problem, identifying what feelings you were experiencing internally just before you started engaging in that pesky old pattern. If you can learn to tolerate your anxiety and feelings, you will no longer engage in your negative patterns. This might not be easy or straightforward at first, so, as with anything else new, it's a good idea to practice. Certain therapists are specifically trained to help you identify your patterns and clean out the roots they grow from, which creates space for new, healthier patterns to emerge that are in alignment with what you want out of your life.
